Sunday, July 30, 2006

Sunday 30 July 2006: Here she is: Heidi!!!!! And here is Sarah in her new hat with a girl from Lille in a shop Heidi would love called RE:STYLE...

Sarah says:
Hi Heidi!!! EVERYWHERE I GO THERE ARE THINGS YOU WOULD LOVE! Seriously -- a million shops with a trillion things you would LOVE!!! It's hard not to buy you everything! Same goes for your future baby! Today in a shop called RE:STYLE in Hermosa Beach I saw a thousand things Heidi would die for but I bought myself something instead of her. See my new hat there? Nice, eh! The funny thing is that the woman in the photo with me who works at Re:style is from Lille France! Her name is Kati and she has lived in California for 5 years. It's a small world after all!

Heidi says: Don't worry! I'm not in the hospital yet! Sarah seems to panic when she doesn't see me for 2 days, and probably thinks that I am giving birth already, but I can reassure her right here right now. I am not planning to give birth too early; I hope my body follows my plans. :)
The heatwave is taking a turn and I am afraid we'll see a lot of clouds this week. Television time!
By the way, my sister Nathalie gave me the seeds for this very nice sunflower. The seeds were accompanied by a tiny little pot and some turf, and now we have huge sunflowers. I love that present. It gives beauty after taking care of it for a couple of months (Nico was the caretaker!).
Sarah adds:
Here's my favorite Postsecret entry this week about illness. Illness and pain suck! I am hating the limits my back pain is putting on me here! Yesterday just walking on the beach sand for just a little while hurt my back so I have had to be careful all day today! When you feel badly and you aren't alone -- when there are people around you -- you can sometimes wonder if they are wondering if your back pain or whatever is just an excuse! It makes you even ask yourself that question sometimes -- is this real, is it as bad as it feels, has this become something I use -- in the end the answer is always -- yes my pain is real -- yes it is what is making me tired and unable to do everything I want to and unable to always decide what I can take and what I can't take -- but it is a struggle to get to that conclusion sometimes. When you feel less than good, you feel guilty here and there and that sucks because it can make you feel worse. I really don't want my kid to grow up with an ill mom who has back pain all the time. Sometimes already she'll say her back hurts. Generally it doesn't actually hurt -- but it is what she knows and what she sees. It's complex but I have to get better! I have to get this operation and I have to hope and trust it will give me more ability to do the things I used to be able to do. I am sick of having to measure and think twice about everything so carefully!

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